Loose Ends

So I have sucked at this whole blog thing. But I got the day off today thanks to all of those who served our country. That has given me the opportunity to write something and watch the Men's D-I Lax championships. UMass has had a cinderella run and as of right now (6:54 left in the 3rd quarter) has been holding strong, though they have given up a couple unanswered goals -- it's 9-6 UVa. As I go to finish this entry... there is 2:00 left and it is 15-7 UVa. I was really hoping that UMass could pull it off.

It's been a couple weeks since I have heard about school, and I guess I can confidentely say that the honeymoon phase of the whole thing is over. I am now working on how I am going to pay for this, where I am going to live, and all the other loose ends that I need to do before I actually get there. I have been in a bit of a quandary as to where I should live - part of me wants to live in Northern Virginia, but then part of me also wants to live right next to school. The former is good because it is generally a little bit cheaper, and the latter because I wouldn't have to commute (which might end up balancing out the whole Northern Virginia being cheaper).

I also started to clean my room up some yesterday, and it hit me that because I am finally in school, I can probably throw out all the stuff on all of the other schools. I have had this black filing thing (plastic, easy to carry) that has followed me for the past 3 years as I have moved from Richmond to Baltimore to DC to Baltimore and back to Richmond. I think I have a bit of separation anxiety as I was actually unable to throw away anything. I did, however, move the GW file from the med school application box to the box where I keep the important things. So maybe thats a good thing.

Also in cleaning my room yesterday, I looked up to my wall of post-its and decided it was time. I took a picture of the final status of my applications, and then I took them all down off of the wall. No longer do I need to keep track of where I am standing with a particular school, whether or not I have mailed them an update letter, or if I have received any word from the school. The picture is on the left, and I think you can click on it if you want to make it bigger.

Here are some loose ends from the last couple weeks. In my going to Florida, I was also able to pick up me mail from down there (the mail is forwarded from Baltimore - my permanent address) and in that I found a rejection letter from Maryland and NYMC. I came back from Florida and I finally received my decision from Penn State, who offered me a spot on the "Hold list." Had this come before I heard from GW, I am not sure how I would have felt, but really, it really doesn't matter. After recieving the contract from GW, I was then able to withdraw from both of the waitlists that I was on. That felt pretty cool.

In my withdrawing from WVU, I was emailed back and the person who emailed me said "Good luck in your medical career". For some reason, this is one of the times when it actually hit me. I know deep down inside I am actually going to school. I also know I have wanted this for so long. But then to hear that made it so real. I just thought that was really awesome. It's been a pretty amazing few weeks and I think it is setting in that I am going to be going.

I guess here's a mushy note. I know I've been through a lot over the past few years, and there have been people that have supported me throughout these times, whether it was a simple email saying good luck, or long conversations, or other times when some of you recognized I just needed to be with someone. For all of these things, I really just want to say thanks. Sometimes it was really hard for me to be appreciative because I was only seeing one side of the issue, but there were always people out there who supported me and I am not sure I could ever return the favor. So thanks.

still waiting (but now for something completely different),
-wait

Details, part 2

So apparently "tomorrow" means the day after next. Well all 8 of you reading didn't die while waiting for part 2, so heeeeeeeeeere we go.

Like I said previously, I hadn't told my parents about my getting into medical school. And part of me wanted to tell them in person so I could see their reactions. Maybe that was selfish of me, but after actually seeing their reactions, I was pretty happy I did. On Thursday afternoon I started looking for plane tickets for me to fly down Saturday -- but when they all cost a lot of money, I decided that I needed to do something drastic.

I called my dad. I called him and gave him a bit of a sob story saying I hadn't been down there to see them in awhile, and wouldn't it be a great idea for me to come down to surprise my mom for Mother's day. After a little bit of thought, he decided that to be a really good idea, and, more importantly, decided he would pay for my ticket down to Florida. SCORE. I finally had a way to Florida without either of them know I had actually gotten into school.

During the excitement of my getting into medical school and making this plane ticket, I did the unthinkable. I had decided that flying out of DC was the cheaper way to go -- and I decided the even better option would be to fly out of National Airport (aka Reagan) and then fly into Dulles. When I realized my stupidity, I almost wanted to kick myself. Luckily I refrained otherwise, I could have probably hurt myself pretty badly.

So after doing Race for the Cure Saturday morning (race fee paid for by work... one good thing about working for a women's center), I drove up to DC and met Erin at Dulles airport, so I could leave my car there. Erin was also nice enough to pick up a couple T-Shirts that said GW Medicine that I could give to my parents so I also got them from her at that time. After making our way to National, I flew to Florida to surprise my parents.

I walked into our house at around 11, and in all the commotion of me coming in, my mom awoke from her half sleeping state on the couch, calling out to my dad asking if everything was ok. I walk into the living room and simply say "Yeah, everything is fine" My mom completely flipped out as she was obviously not expecting to see me. I just gave her a big hug and said happy Mother's Day! Keep in mind, I have yet to tell them that I actually got into school. We sit around and talk for about an hour, with my mom asking questions about what I am doing for the rest of the summer, and when I am going to be moving out of Richmond, and what I am going to do if I end up not getting into medical school. My dad also said he talked to my uncle and from what my dad said, I had almost thought that my uncle had spilled the beans (my uncle knew on Thursday), but I couldn't ask questions, otherwise I would have given it away. It took all that I could to not say anything, and after about an hour my mom decides that she needs to go to bed which was a HUGE relief. After she went to sleep, I wasn't far behind, but I needed to wrap the T-shirts so that I could give them to my mom at breakfast the following morning. As I searched the house up and down, my dad was a little curious as to what I was doing, and when I told him I was looking for wrapping paper for my Mother's Day present, he tried to convince me to wait until tomorrow. I emphatically said "NO. I need to do this tonight." I am sure that confused him some, but I didn't care.

I woke up the next morning, and we made our way to Lago Mar (beach club we belong to) for the all you can eat breakfast buffet. I managed to walk into the place with the present and my mom didn't notice. But let's be honest, if you know my mom, that really isn't that hard of a task. We sat down to breakfast, ordered our juices and coffees and what not, and got settled at the table. I then told my mom that I have my Mother's Day present for her, and I handed the package across the table to her. She says something to the effect of "Oh no, you didn't need to get me anything, just your coming down was plenty!" Little did she know, the REAL reason I was coming down was the fact that I was telling them that I got into school. So my mom undoes the ribbon (I went all out) and then unwraps the present and saw soemthing navy. She starts to unfurl the T-shirts and reads with some trepidation GW Medicine. She then looks at me and asks "Isn't this a little early?" I just look at her and watch as the wheels spin faster and faster in her head, and she bursts out "YOU GOT IN?!?!" I simply smiled and did a slight nod of the head. Meanwhile, my dad sitting next to me had read the T-shirt as my mom was unfurling it, looked over at me with a huge smile and says congratulations. I then get big hugs from both of my parents, and I could tell that my mom was simply ecstatic.

For a pictorial view of this occurence, take a look:


The sequence of pictures is probably pretty obvious -- the last one is my parents and I outside the bar at the beach at around 3 in the afternoon. There was obvious reason to celebrate - and it really was great to have a pina colada (with a topper) while sitting in a hammock under a palm tree. The first 3 pictures are a little dark, but hopefully you can see my mom's reactions.

One of the great things was that after I told my parents, my mom started listing off the people I needed to call. And after all the people she listed off, I told her that they already know. She then was surprised to know that she was one of the last people to actually know about school. So the whole surprise worked out really really well. Aaaand I got to have a nice little break in Florida as I didn't make it back to Richmond until late Tuesday night (after flying into Dulles of course). On my last night in Florida, my mom had gotten me yellow and navy balloons with a huge one that sung out the song "Celebration" when you tapped it. Which was great and all... yet it got a little annoying after awhile. All in all it was a great few days down in Florida. One thing that sucked was that I had to fly back through Detroit. Oh well.

Alright, well that's enough for now. I will probably write more tomorrow... Not so much on how exactly it happened, but more about the feelings behind the whole thing (read: more introspective post).

still waiting,
-wait

Details, part 1

Well this post is a long time coming, whether it be 3 years, or 8 days. So I will take the liberty to expound on the previous post of "I'm in. Details to follow"

Just as a starter, for those of you who couldn't quite put it together, "I'm in" refers to the fact that I was accepted to a medical school, and that school is George Washington up in DC. I couldn't be more thrilled at this (well, maybe if it was a little cheaper) and am so incredibly excited at the prospect of going to medical school, being back in DC, and I think part of me is relieved that I am no longer wondering what I am going to be doing in the fall. Here's how it all transpired:

I was working at the office last Thursday (May 11) at one of the 2 computers and Ian (also my roommate for those who don't know) was at the computer next to mine. My phone is in my pocket on vibrate and a little before 3, it starts to ring. I pull it out of my pocket and the phone number is 202-994-1000. I thought about this a little (like .01 sec) and thought hmmm I wonder if this is it. So I open my phone and give the customary "Hello" greeting. All I hear on the other end is absolutely nothing. After 10 or 15 more seconds of attempting to get in touch with the person on the other line, I come the realization that noone is there. So I fold my phone as my anticipation deflates some. I put the phone on the counter, and attempt to start working again. But I can't stop thinking about it. I remembered that I had put the phone number to the GW admissions office in my phone, so I quickly pick up my phone and look for the number for the admissions office and it is 202-994-3534 (not sure of the last 4 digits). Thinking about this, I deduced that 994-1000 is probably the general number for GW and the number that shows up when dialing out. I relay my detective work with a smile to Ian, who then smiles, realizing what is about to occur.

3 painstakingly long minutes later, my phone rings again. Same number. Heart rate increases to near aerobic threshold (that's a lie). Opening my phone a little more carefully this time, I say hello and this time I receive a response. The female voice on the other end informs me that she is the dean of admissions at GW and jokingly wanted to know why I didn't answer the first time. The next words out of her mouth were "Well, I guess this is the call you have been waiting for." My smile broadens to an extent I had no idea was even possible. I shoot a look over to Ian and he's smiling broadly too. Truth be told, I don't remember much else of the conversation, besides the fact that if I have questions that I need to contact her, and that I needed to sign the contract within a week. I think we talked for a good 10 minutes, but I don't really know, I was just too excited.

I hang up my phone, and Ian and I embrace in a huge hug as words weren't even appropiate for the time. One of my coworkers walked in during the hug and I found out later she was going to make fun of us, but then recognized the fact that something big probably just happened.

So I leave the office with a totally different demeanor, though at the time, it definitely had not set in that I was in fact, going to be a doctor. I am not sure that it has even hit now. I have been an applicant to medical school for so many years now, and now to finally get the nod, it feels very surreal. I feel like I need to filling out the application again soon. But for the first time in 3 years, I am not "applying to medical school."

The walk out also commenced the phone calls. I had gotten a voicemail from my roommate from last year letting me know he got the call. I called him back congratulating him. I called my other current roommate in a completely serious tone asking where he was (he was home) and that he needed to stay there until I got home as I had to ask him something. I told him not to worry, but I just needed to speak with him when I got home. After my 20 minute ride home and a bunch of calls, I got home and my roommate had a huge look of concern on his face as I walked through the door. I just looked at him all serious like, and said "I am going to be in DC next year" to which he jumped out of the chair in excitement. I then cracked a celebratory beer at 3:50.

The phone calls continued through the afternoon until about 5 when I showed up to UofR as I wanted to share the news with some of the professors there. I first stopped by Dr. Mayes office and being the day after finals are over and after 5, he wasn't in his office. As he lives on campus, I started walking to his apartment, and as I am crossing the parking lot, who pulls in?? Dr. Mayes. He was really excited and told me that he and his wife would raise an extra glass of wine tonight to me (he had a bottle of wine in his hand as it was). I made my way over to the science building and found Dr. Leo who looked like he was having a rough day, but said that on hearing that news, his day just got a lot better... He then took me to Dr. Myers who was also very proud of me asking questions about what I did. I couldn't find any other professors, but I did leave a message on Dr. Hamm's door for her to call me, which she did later that night; she too was happy for me.

I eventually made it out to dinner with Ian, Mike and Aaron down in Carytown at Double T's BBQ, and that was followed by a rousing trip to Champps Sports Bar and Grille. About 15 people showed up there, and needless to say, some fun was had. Some (?) alcohol was drunk, whether that be beer or other drinks isn't a necessary detail. The details from that night were that we had a lot of fun. It was a celebration 3 years in the making, and it really was really awesome having people to share it with. So thanks. No more mushy stuff now. We made it home by 1:45 and I climbed in bed. Friday morning was rough. My boss wasn't expecting me, but I was a trooper and made it by 8:20 (8 is our supposed arrival time).

By this point, I hadn't told my parents and there's a reason for that. But I am too tired to explain that right now, so that will come tomorrow. Also in part 2 will be much more of a description what has been going through my head in the past week and a lot of realizations that I have come to in the last week. It's been quite a whirlwind, and I have come to understand certain things that I would never have really thought I needed to quite understand. That's confusing, but hopefully it will make sense after tomorrow's post.

still waiting,
-wait

I'm in

I'm in.

Details to follow.

Bike shorts

Hi there. I thought I should say something like "Welcome back to me" or something. It's been a good 9 days since I wrote anything. I also think the last time I wrote, I said I would try and write more... we all see how that went (not well, for those of you keeping tabs).

Here's the med school update: Nada. For the past 9 days I have heard absolutely nothing. No acceptances, no rejections, no fake acceptance email (cough cough Georgetown cough cough) and no emails whatsoever from schools. 7 weeks ago tonight, I was spending the night at the Hershey Lodge on the eve of my interview at Penn State... and I still haven't heard anything from them. They said 6-8 weeks however, so I right now I am in the middle of the window of opportunity. So while I am waiting impatiently for this, I can't be too over-zealous quite yet. Give me a week and we'll see how I am.

May 15th is next Monday, so I am hoping that some good news will come shortly. I guess that's all I really want to say about that. (Come on GW... Come on WVU... Come on GW... Come on WVU... etc. etc. etc.)

No joke this time around, but I do have a pretty funny picture someone from work sent me. The title of the email that the picture came from is: Why bicycle shorts are always BLACK!!!!






























That's all I got.

still waiting,
-wait

Questions

True to what I have said before, the process of applying to medical school goes through an ebb and flow process. While it had been a few days since I heard anything from schools until Saturday, there has now been 2 days (days where we receive mail at least) where I have heard news medical schools. Unfortunately the news is no different than what I heard on Saturday; this time the rejection comes from Jefferson in Philadelphia.

I moved the post-it notes on my wall tonight and realized I really only have 3 schools left to hear anything from - those being Drexel, MD and NYMC. And while I know I won't hear anything positive from these schools, a true feeling of nervousness set it in tonight - as I have said in the past, waitlists have never been positive for me, and by this point, I am not expecting anything better than a waitlist from Penn State. So that feeling of "oh crap" is starting to set in. And that scares me... a lot. Do I do this whole thing again? Do I put myself through this process again? If I do, what do I do for the next 12 months? People have started asking me the "What if..." questions and I haven't answered yet because I don't know. I don't know what I am going to do. I don't know if I am going to apply again. I don't know where I want to go. I don't know what to do with my life. For 5 years now I have had my eyes set on this goal, can I just give it up? Can I see myself doing something else?

These are some questions I think I need to start considering over the next few weeks. AMCAS 2007 opens up tomorrow meaning I can start filling out the application to medical school for a 4th year in a row, but am I truly ready for that?

As in the past, I don't like to end on such downer points, so here's another joke. An older businessman from Florida is in New York City on a business trip in the middle of a snowstorm in February. The man is walking on the sidwalk and slips on some ice and ends up breaking his hip. He obviously goes to the hospital and finds out he needs surgery to get it fixed and needs a screw placed in his hip to help it out. Shortly after the surgery, the businessman is back to normal and he gets a bill for $5,000 for his surgery. Enraged, the business man writes to the doctor asking for an itemized bill claiming he could have gone to the store and bought a screw for $1. The doctor writes back to the businessman with an itemized bill: 1. Screw: $1; 2. Knowing how to put the screw in: $4,999. Total: $5,000.

still waiting,
-wait